Drowning in Doubt? How to Tell Fear from Intuition and Find Your Way

Ever been just about to make a decision or take action and something is telling you no? And then you’re stuck wondering whether it’s fear or intuition? If it’s fear, maybe you’re resisting because it’s actually something you should do. If it’s intuition, maybe you’re supposed to listen. So how do you know?

Two things always help me untangle tricky, intangible concepts: analogies and science. Let’s dive into both to help you tell the difference between fear and intuition — so next time you’re faced with this dilemma (because you will be), you’ll have a clearer sense of what’s really going on.

The Ocean Analogy

I’m a Pisces and live on an island, so ocean analogies are my jam. Hopefully, you can relate — or create your own version that fits your world.

Fear is like being caught in a raging storm at sea — think A Perfect Storm levels of chaos. The waves are towering, the wind is howling, and the noise is overwhelming. Your thoughts are racing, firing off panicked warnings: “I’m going to capsize!” “I need to get out of this boat right now!” “What if I don’t make it?!” Your body tenses, adrenaline spikes, and you’re stuck in fight, flight, or freeze mode. Everything feels urgent, unpredictable, and out of control.

Intuition is in that same boat, but it’s like having an inner compass that stays steady, even in the storm. The waves are still crashing, the wind is still fierce — but you’re grounded. It’s not that you deny the storm; you just don’t let it own you. There’s a quiet, confident sense of “I can handle this” or “This is hard, but I know what to do.” You’re focused, intentional, and making adjustments with calm clarity, not desperation.

The Psychology and Biology Behind Fear vs. Intuition

Let’s break it down from a mind-body perspective — because what’s happening internally is just as important as how it feels.

1. Thoughts

• Fear kicks in when your brain perceives a threat. Your thoughts start spinning worst-case scenarios, often on repeat. “What if I fail? What if they think I’m a fraud? What if this blows up in my face?” Your brain goes into overdrive, creating a feedback loop of anxiety.

• Intuition, on the other hand, feels quiet and clear. It’s more of a focused, concise knowing — a subtle “yes” or “no” without all the mental chatter. It doesn’t explain itself or argue; it just... is.

2. Physical Sensations

• Fear triggers your body’s fight-or-flight response. You might notice a racing heart, shallow breathing, sweaty palms, or a tight chest. It feels jittery, tense, or frozen — like you downed three espressos on an empty stomach.

• Intuition feels calmer and more grounded. It’s like a deep, steady breath or that satisfying exhale when something just feels right. You might feel a sense of ease in your chest, a gut feeling of certainty, or even a lightness in your body.

3. Influences

• Fear is shaped by past experiences, traumas, and societal conditioning. It’s your brain interpreting the present through the lens of old stories: “Last time I did this, it didn’t go well, so it won’t go well now.”

• Intuition taps into deeper, subconscious wisdom — still informed by your past, but more holistically. It integrates everything you’ve learned and experienced, without getting stuck in old fears. It’s less about external expectations and more about staying true to your values and integrity.

4. Emotional Impact

• Fear often leaves you feeling drained, anxious, or stuck — like you’re spinning your wheels and getting nowhere.

• Intuition feels empowering. Even if the next step is hard, you feel aligned, clear, and at peace with your decision.

5. Decision-Making and Action

• Fear leads to paralysis or impulsive decisions aimed at avoiding pain — physical, mental, or emotional.

• Intuition supports grounded, intentional action. It encourages you to move forward in a way that feels authentic, even when the path isn’t easy.

For Coaches: Navigating the Fear vs. Intuition Storm

Let’s bring this back to coaching — because this is where it really matters.

When fear runs the show, it sounds like:

• “What if my client doesn’t get results? What if they think I’m not good enough?”

• “I shouldn’t raise my rates — they’ll think I’m greedy.”

• “I can’t niche down; I’ll lose clients.”

And the actions that follow? Overexplaining, over-delivering, undercharging, or staying stuck in indecision.

Intuition sounds more like:

• “This client isn’t the right fit, and that’s okay.”

• “I know the value I bring, and my rates should reflect that.”

• “It’s time to pivot — even though it’s uncomfortable.”

The actions that follow? Saying no to misaligned clients, standing by your worth, and making strategic shifts without second-guessing yourself to death.

In Summary: The Storms Don’t Change — But You Can

The storms of life — and coaching — don’t stop. Clients will still ghost you. Launches will still flop. Impostor syndrome will still sneak in.

The difference is in how you respond. Fear makes you react impulsively, desperately trying to control the storm. Intuition helps you stay grounded, guiding you through it with clarity and confidence — even when the waves are relentless.

The next time you’re stuck between fear and intuition, stop and listen. If it’s loud and panicky, it’s fear. If it’s quiet, steady, and sure — trust it. Your intuition already knows the way. You just have to follow it.

Now that you know the difference between fear and intuition, I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever faced a tough decision and struggled to tell them apart?

What did you end up choosing — and how did it turn out?

Share your experience in the comments below — your insight might just help someone else find their way through the storm.